Rampage. A Real rampage.

[den]

Today brought the sad news of a zookeeper being killed in what is probably South America's second most embarrassing way to die: Killed by an anteater.

I'm lucky, I thought as I walked into my room. My anteater is a nice little thing. Imagine being mauled by an echidna...

My room was trashed. Fips had escaped from his bed-cage and rampaged through my room. A newspaper had been shredded into confetti, the bottom rows the book shelves had all been emptied with the books scattered all over the place. Towels were pulled from racks. My laundry on the floor smelled of echidna wizz. The carpet...

Fips had burrowed under the edges of the carpet, shredding a strip 6" wide and 2 feet long. Underfelt fragments were scattered all over. He found the old rolled scrap near a wall and crawled inside to sleep, which is where I found him.

Tonight I will be making sure his cage is well locked. I do not want to wake up to discover myself being mauled to death by a pissed off echidna. That would be Australia's third-most embarrassing way to die.

Comments

[tigermorph.livejournal.com]

Do I want to know the two most embarrassing ways to die?

Oh Fips... Well, Den.... at least you know your books are free of termites... Or something.

[goodluckfox.livejournal.com]

There are so, SO many ways to apparently get killed in Australia.

o/ Come to Australia... you might accidently get killed. o/
o/ Your blood is bound to be spilled.

[weyrdbird.livejournal.com]

Yeah, that release strategy is a good thing.
I suspect Fips was hungry, or very bored. If it weren't for his fondness for the rolled up carpet (substiute burrow?), I could see him lurking quietly behind the door, "patently on the idear of escape!". He's that most dangerous of creatures!:D

[siliconshaman.livejournal.com]

I guess being killed by a ray is No1, but what's no2 ? Rogered to death by sex-crazed koalas?

[tatterdemalion.livejournal.com]

sooo, first most embarassing way to die would be being mauled to death by a wobegong I think.. what would number two be?

[hedgegoth.livejournal.com]

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=310128468072066622&q=otters

[walkertxkitty.livejournal.com]

Oh, no! I'm sorry, I really am, it must have been a horrible mess and it sounds like it will be expensive to repair but...

Damn, that's funny!

I've had the dubious experience of having my hybrid pillage the house. Never, never piss off anything with wildlife blood running through it. He shredded the carpet, the padding, and the floor. He tore the blinds off the window. He peed on my clean laundry and then on the dirty laundry. He left a "present" on my pillow on the bed.

I feel for you, man.

[beki.livejournal.com]

And the first two would be?

[acelightning.livejournal.com]