Let the Darwinism commence.

[den]

I received a call on the rescue line today from a lady in Parkes. Her son had brought home a baby snake. I asked her to describe it to me, and she said it was 12" long, almost white on the stomach, pale brown on top and had a dark brown head with orange markings.

"Where is it?" I asked.

"My son is playing with it in the kitchen."

"It's a baby eastern brown snake."

"Oh! They grow up to be poisonous, don't they!"

I almost told her that of the world's 14 most poisonous snakes, it's number 14. Instead, I said "They're venomous when they hatch. You're lucky the mouth and fangs are too small to bite a finger, or you'd be up in the hospital now."

"Why"

"Your son would be getting antivenein there."

I heard her put the phone down then scream out "DAVID PUT THAT BLOODY THING DOWN NOW!" She came back and asked me what to do. What I wanted to say was the eastern brown snake makes an excellent pet and enjoys being cuddled. I told her to take it to the edge of town and let it go. I had to.

Comments

[tropism.livejournal.com]

You'd think that, with Australia the way it is with venomous snakes, people would get it drilled into their heads that you shouldn't touch 'em.

[hobbitblue.livejournal.com]

She's not twigged to the fact that everything in Australia is lethal with the exception of some of the sheep, then? Sounds *such* a pretty snakey-poo though... apart from that whole instant death from the cute widdle fangs aspect, I mean.

[oceansedge.livejournal.com]

you'd think Australians would be USED to the idea they live in a country thats bloody well tryin to kill, or at least maim em.

[eozarth.livejournal.com]

Oh Den... you gave up the perfect opportunity to pare down some of the stupid people population :(

[tatterdemalion.livejournal.com]

stupid bint..

[frith]

At least they sounded like nice idiots. Right? Like, they could'a been pokin' pins in the scaley critter or something, but they weren't. Anyway, with all that arid Outback, gotta have something to keep the population in check.

[mortonfox.livejournal.com]

Playing with snakes... yikes! I stay away from all snakes around here, even though only a few kinds are poisonous.

[happiestsadist.livejournal.com]

Heehee! And for the "cuddle" idea. I love you.

[ursulav.livejournal.com]

The stupidity, it burrrrrns...

[ka-crow.livejournal.com]

Cuddled... snerk.

Maybe .au needs a whole lot of billboards that say in large red letters, "Don't Pick Up Any Fucking Snakes."

[weyrdbird.livejournal.com]

Good lord! I've heard enough to know by now that when you go to australia, you don't pick up anything, let it fall on you, or rub up against your legs even if you think it's benign;). You just wear full body armor and run a lot:D.

Too bad the snakes don't have markings that read venom scale from 1 to "can kill an entire village just by looking, you'd be stupid to handle me without a special suit and goggles, mate." Maybe dumb people would leave them alone, but with our luck, they couldn't read either8/.

[taldragon.livejournal.com]

*points and laughs*

[annvole.livejournal.com]

quote:
The unidentified inspector had no idea of the danger he was in. But luckily he had quick hands.

"He grabbed hold of the snake by the tail, picked it up. They found a water jug close by and they put him inside that,"

...

"If it bites you with a full amount of venom, if you didn't have immediate access to anti-venom you'd die within five, 10 minutes or so,"

Link:
http://www.cbc.ca/ns/story/ns-viper-port20060301.html

[breckan.livejournal.com]

Oh god oh god oh god...

I'm glad there wasn't a tragedy.

That aside, I don't think I've laughed at an LJ thread so much for weeks :)