Chaser Nightly Network News

CNNNN is a biting satirical program that had its first airing this week. It looks like CNN, complete with scrolling news bar (...Bird and bee have sex with disasterous consequences...CNNNN...Michael Jackon cuts off nose to spite face...CNNNN...) This week they had a go at Bush, Blair and Howard about the possible attack on Iraq. One article that sticks in my mind was:

The September 11 terrorists were all Saudi Arabians; they trained in Afghanistan; were financed by Kuwait, Lybia, Syria and Lebenon; went to school in Germany; visited UK and Jamaca, met in Malaysia and trained to fly in the US. The only way we can punish those involved is to bomb Iraq.

Pruning and yard work

Dad bashed on the door of the garage at 8am to wake me (since I am a poor student living on government subsidies, Mum and dad's garage has been converted into a room for me) and shouted "I've pruned some trees. Can you cut the branches into smaller sizes so we can get rid of them?"

Oh no. Dad pruned.

Every time he decides to prune the trees he grabs the saw and prunes and prunes and fucking prunes the trees. When we lived on the farm he pruned the apple trees and we didn't get any apples for 2 years. So now, when Dad announces that he will prune the trees, Mum hides the saws until the feeling passes.

So this morning the yard looked like it had been hit by a cyclone. There were branches everywhere. I grabbed the saw and spent time In The Yard. Outside. In The Sun. Doing Gardening. Now all the large branches are cut into small lumps and all the long branches have been turned into short branches.

Who needs a sim-house when you can do the real thing?

Happy Tree Friends

Watch The Happy Tree friends be cute and cuddly as they play in the magic forest and dismember each other bloodily.

I laughed until I wheezed.