Stories of a short, fat bastard.

Howdy, and how do I get me a chunk of a place called Batland? That would be the most utopic place, assuming it's called Batland because of the bats. I am obsessed with bats, I plan on living in South America some day to dedicate my life to studying them. Fascinating creatures - big props to BATS!!!! I don't know when my fascination started, but they have been my favorite mammal as long as I can remember, I collect batmobilia and it looks like Halloween in my house all year round. Some people call me BatGirl, because I have a small Batman figurine swinging off my rearview mirror in my huge car, and a decal (not applied but propped up against) on the back window of a cool looking bat symbol. I just bought a set of boy's BATMAN Underoos (remember Underoos?) in a size large - just for the t-shirt. Hopefully I can find a crown that doesn't obstruct the ears of my BATMAN mask....so when I become Queen of Batland, I can play the role properly dressed. Let me know, mayhaps we can work out a time share deal and you can come stay in Calgary next winter while I am ruling my new land down under?